Just Another Wednesday

I’ve heard that a person is supposed to have an intuition.
A sense of knowing,
A gut feeling in their stomach,
That warns them that something bad will happen.
Sometimes I wonder why I didn’t know.
How I could be so blind and naïve,
And not see the car driving straight at me with their headlights.
But to me it was just another Wednesday.

I remember walking into the house that day after work,
Oblivious to what scene awaited me.
I remember calling out to you, shouting that I was home.
But there was no response.
I remember sprinting upstairs with my mom,
and seeing the glow of the yellow bathroom light behind the door.
But it was locked.
I remember calling 9-1-1 begging them to come quickly,
as my mother used a screwdriver to open the door.
But it was supposed to be another Wednesday.

It was only a matter of time, before sirens could be heard off in the distance.
Flashing red and blue lights plagued my vision,
As I watched paramedics rush into our home.
I remember feeling giddy and nervous,
My body was shaking, and my mind refused to believe what was happening.
I remember the measly 12-minute drive to our local emergency room,
Felt so painstakingly long.
It was still just a Wednesday.

I remember sitting in a room encased in white walls,
on a green cushioned bench.
Surrounded by family and loved ones,
And a glimmer of hope encompassed me.
I remember a middle-aged man, walking through swinging double doors,
Walking with such confidence and authority until he stopped and stared at us.
He paused, cleared his throat, and plainly said,
“I’m sorry for your loss”.
It was no longer just another Wednesday.

It was only a matter of time, before my world fell apart.
I screamed and wailed,
Wondering how this is fair and why this happened to me.
Wondering why my glimmer of hope was squashed,
By white sneakers on brown carpet floors.
And why my Wednesday was flipped upside down.

I remember seeing you for the first time.
Hooked up to tubes and machinery,
With no heartbeat or pulse.
I remember feeling bile rise up within my throat,
Making me violently ill.
I remember crying so hard that I gave myself a headache,
As I stared at your lifeless body.
I often envy other people now,
Because I no longer get to live just another Wednesday.